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3:23 p.m. - 19.07.02 Yesterday was all sorts of fun, after a week of "not fun" baking with Rhonda. Not fun is in quotes because, while being fun, we were not really technically having fun? I don't know. Working when I do is starting to get really annoying. Every night, for about two hours, not enough to really make money but anough time to be kind of annoying when trying to make plans with people. So I just end up being lonely, because of this awkwardly timed thing. I am reading too much, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but which I don't really like to do. Yesterday, though, Rhonda, Nick and I had a picnic at Green Lane, where I got bit by a duck thanks to Rhonda and her earth mother goddess duck feeding tendancies. I got to try all natural peanut butter for the first time, thanks to Nick, the peanut butter obsessive last living Real American man. It was very peaceful and nice to just sit by the water taking pictures and looking at ducks and making sandwiches. After we got back to Rhonda's house I had to leave to go to work for about two hours. I cleaned, doing the vaccuumind at Goddard instead of he toilets. Then, I had to go to Blockbuster with my employer. Which is really not fair, considering that I really just wanted to get back to my friends, and was not being paid for my time. I am bot being paid to be a movie-renting consultant; I really did not feel like spending half an hour there with her while she became indecisive about movies. The day before we were out for two hours, only three or so I will get paid for, just because she had to run some errands. I don't know, I just don't think that I should have to sit around while she gets her son a cheeseburger. And while she picks stuff up for her other jobs. I don't like this job very much anymore, can you tell? Anyway, when we finally got done picking out a movie for her (Serendipity), I got to finally go home and go back to Rhonda's house, where the two of them were painting Nick's cell phone with nail polish. Rhonda painted my nails with some yucky smelling candy cane pink nail polish. It really was quite a time for girly activities, because after that we made peanut butter and chocolate tandy cakes. Which of course led to a big water/flour/egg yuckies fight in Rhonda's kitchen. I mean, how could it not? Egg is really yucky when it dries in your hair. And somehow I got all four of the espeically yucky snotty egg bits in my hair, lucky me! :p. So, I got to stand in Rhonda's kitchen in my underwear, washing my shorts in the sink to get the egg yolk off of me, trying not to have my picture taken. Nick lent me some shorts on the premise that I would walk with him to his car in my underwear, which I did - there's something really liberating about cavorting around in your underwear in the dead of night where about 40 people could see you. I suggets you all try it sometime. So we cleaned up the eggy mess, and talked for a while, and then really freaked ourselves out doing Tarot readings that were really kinda scarily accurate. Tonight I hav to work again, this time with my boss and her little relation-boy. Hopefully that means that cleaning will take less time. Hopefully that doesn't mean that I have to hang around while she talks to people again. Hopefully things will be good tonight. I actually don't know why I have to go, since he's going...it's not really a job that needs three people. In the slightest. I'm very complainy about it, I know. Emotionally things are going better, though. I'm beginning to think that I can stand on my own. Which I have to learn to do again. I can't just go running off into the arms of someone who will take care of me, no matter how appealing that looks. because I am stronger than that. and because I have to be myself first of all. and all that inspirational rot. I just wish that things weren't so confusing. But then, I want things to be confusing, because it's so deliciously exciting.
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